David Westfall: A Letter

CJ, May I call you CJ?

I don't know that we have ever met. I'm guessing you are about ten years younger than my father, and he graduated from West Lafayette High School. If you were married in 69', when I was four, I'm sure we didn't attend school together either.

I was hesitant to accept your friendship request (Facebook).  I try to keep FB down to friends I know. I'm all about quality over quantity. Then you sent me invitations to your blogs. "Oh crap!" I thought.  I've been duped into accepting a friend request and all she wants is blog followers.

Well, I'm glad I did accept your request. I've been trying to read your blogs, but there are so many of them!
I'm not a Vietnam Vet. I'm a first Gulf War Vet. I spent my time flying around in my little helicopter in the Gulf region, Somalia and Central America doing lots of special things. 

I find almost all aspects of your Vietnam blog disturbing. Now wait. Not in a bad way. Disturbing in a happy, sad, heartbreaking, motivating way. Hearing the words of other combat vets. Hearing the words of that 17 year old girl in Guam. Hearing your words. 

Your blog "From Bride to Widow" had me in tears. All of these years, I thought of the soldiers and what they went through. I never really took the time to think of the loved ones back home. Sure, I saw movies about it. My own parents had both commented about how their wonderful son, David, had joined the Navy and some ass named "Bull" had come back to them 12 years later. But at least I came home.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Thank you for sending the friend request. Thank you for the blogs. I'm so very sorry for your loss all those years ago.
David


Welcome Home, "Bull" -- 
Your letter touched me very deeply, and I'm humbled by your warm and thoughtful comments about Memoirs From Nam, and for your gracious expression of sympathy. 

All I can think of to say is many, many "Thank You's". Thank you for accepting my friendship request. Thank you for taking the time to read the blog entries. Thank you, most especially, for what you did for our country, "... flying around in your little helicopter ... doing lots of special things;" I'm glad you came home safely and that I have had the profound good fortune to "meet" you ... your parents may tease you, but I know they are proud.

May I please have your permission to post your letter to me on Memoirs tomorrow? It would be such an honor and I know it will touch others' hearts as it has touched mine.

She who flies with sparrows bows to one who has soared with eagles ...
My very warmest regards and respect,
CJ


“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale

Well-Meaning Intent

by CJ Parrish (Kempf) Heck

An English teacher once told me that the biggest secret to writing is to have something to say and then to say it as clearly and as succinctly as you can. That was the secret. I've always tried to write that way and, for the most part, I feel it's worked. Let's see if I can do that here today ... without being rude or hurtful.

I've gotten some rather odd emails since I wrote the blog, "Bride to Widow", a few weeks ago about my own experience when I was notified about Doug's death in Vietnam.  Don't get me wrong, most of the emails were very nice -- but some people, out of I'm sure well-meaning intent, said the dumbest things.  One said how glad I must have been not to have had any children to raise on my own.   Another, again out of misguided and well-meaning intent, asked me if I had known what was going to happen, or if I could go back in time and do things over, would I have still chosen to get married before he was sent to Vietnam.  I don't know about you, but I was raised to keep such comments to myself.

I haven't answered the emails yet -- the main reason is, I'm hard-pressed to know what to say to them.  It seems they've already made up their minds how they would feel in the same situations.  But can anyone ever really know how they would feel or react, unless they were there?  There's a saying that to really know someone, you have to walk a mile in their shoes ... anyway, I've thought a lot about those two comments since I received them.  I've come to the conclusion that I'm not going to answer the emails.  If they happen to read this blog today, they'll be aware of my answers.

How can you explain to someone that love is the most important, magical emotion a human being can ever experience?  How can you put a value on love when it's priceless, or quantify it with, "Gee, I'll marry you if you'll live, and not marry you if you don't" --  of course I would marry him all over again.  I wouldn't change a thing, if I could go back in time.  At least we had the time together that we did have ...

As to the other question -- let it be known that I would have given my right arm and left leg to have had a child.  I would have considered it an honor, a gift, to have had a part of Doug, a child to raise with love.  And you can be sure, that child would know what a wonderful man their father was -- and how he died for all of us, even those who ask dumb questions.

God Bless America.


“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale

Two Opinions

Yesterday's blog on Prayer elicited some very strong responses --  I share their well-expressed opinions and I would like to share them with you today.  The first came from a friend on Facebook, Jan Hoffman, and the other one,  from our mutual friend, Richard Schwartz, a Vietnam Vet and contributing writer here on Memoirs:

Prayer in America

My Opinion
by Jan Hoffman:

Here, Here, CJ!  This Great Nation was FOUNDED on Religious Principles and it was written into ALL of our Guiding Documents.

If our Doctrines are so OFFENSIVE to these IMPLANTS - - I say GET OUT or SHUT THE HELL UP!  They knew, when they first decided to come to this Great Nation, what this Country's Beliefs and Principles were all about - - yet they came - - to get away from the very Oppression they are trying to SHOVE down OUR Throats!

I say to them:  "This is OUR COUNTRY - - LOVE IT and ALL IT STANDS FOR - - or LEAVE IT and find a country that better suits YOUR beliefs!"

This is being written by a Great-Grand-Daughter, Grand-Daughter, Daughter, Niece, ex-wife, and the Mother-in Law of Military personel who fought, were wounded, and gave their lives to Protect & Defend our Rights!

Sincerely,
Jan Hoffman


My Opinion
by Richard Schwartz

Its a cultural war.  Either we defend our Judeo-Christian heritage or we lose it!  Since I was a child, people have been wishing me Merry Christmas.  Should I be offended because I'm a Jew?  Of course NOT! I'm happy that someone takes the time to wish me well during their holiday.  And my Christian friends send me a Happy Hanukkah message during my holiday and some of them even wish me well on the Jewish High Holidays.

It's no coincidence that, in order to be considered an educated person at the time of the founding of our country, you had to know enough Hebrew to read the Hebrew bible in Hebrew besides having a thorough knowledge of the Christian Bible.  All the founding fathers could read Hebrew and most could write it.  Our concept of liberty and freedom is firmly rooted in our Judeo-Christian heritage.  We need to keep this in mind when we vote.

If you want to know how awful it's really getting, please read a copy of Mark Steyn's "America Alone"  where he describes how political correctness and multiculturalism is destroying Europe.  (Note Angela Merkel's recent comment that Germany's attemp at multiculturalism has failed).  If you want to study an interesting difference in beliefs on your own, investigate the story of Abraham and the binding of Isaac in the Hebrew Bible vs. the account of the same story in the Koran.  The difference is 180 degrees.

Notice the firing of Juan Williams from NPR. Apparently, he is not sufficiently "politically correct" for NPR.  My politics tend to be conservative and libertarian. Juan Williams' views are liberal,  I ALWAYS look forward to listening to him because he makes me think about my beliefs.  In my humble opinion, NPR firing him is another shot in the culture war in this country and I've already written notes to my local NPR station, CPR, and my representatives in Washington concerning this incident.

Oops -  I didn't mean to get on a soap box, but when our local school has to start calling a Christmas tree a "Holiday" tree, our culture is drowning in the political correctness swamp.

Carolyn and I, (mostly Carolyn!), just got our garden in shape for the winter with weeding, tilling, and planting a rye grass cover crop. The weather is turning cooler and the rains are starting up here in Maple Valley.  The salmon runs are over. It was a curious salmon season.

Locally, we had a below-average number of returning salmon.  At the Frasier river in Canada, they had a tremendous salmon run such that the salmon canneries were begging for extra workers.  I've talked to a number of marine biologists and no one seems to know why the difference occurred.  The leaves on the deciduous trees are turning beautiful reds and golds, while the evergreens will maintain their intense green through the winter.  I even heard that the mountain pass a couple of hours' drive away from Maple Valley got a dusting of snow last night.

My best to you and Robert,

Richard


As always, I thank the two of you for your thoughts -- and for taking the time to share them.
My warmest regards, a hug, and lots of respect,
CJ


“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale

Keep Looking Up ...

Andy Rooney has always been one of my favorite writers and speakers.  He can take any subject at all, pepper it with a little Rooney humor and a lot of Rooney insight, and Voila!  It makes absolute and perfect sense to anyone who reads it.  Here is an article I found which touches on the subject of prayer ... I know you'll enjoy it as much as I did.  Thanks, Andy, you rock ...
~CJ


Prayer
by Andy Rooney

I don't believe in Santa Claus, but I'm not going to sue somebody for singing a Ho-Ho-Ho song in December. I don't agree with Darwin, but I didn't go out and hire a lawyer when my high school teacher taught Darwin's Theory of Evolution.

Life, liberty or your pursuit of happiness will not be endangered because someone says a 30-second prayer before a football game. So, what's the big deal? It's not like somebody is up there reading the entire Book of Acts. They're just talking to a God they believe in and asking him to grant safety to the players on the field and the fans going home from the game.

But it's a Christian prayer, some will argue. Yes, and this is the United States of America and Canada, countries founded on Christian principles. According to our very own phone book, Christian churches outnumber all others better than 200-to-1. So what would you expect -- somebody chanting Hare Krishna?  If I went to a football game in Jerusalem, I would expect to hear a Jewish prayer. If I went to a soccer game in Baghdad, I would expect to hear a Muslim prayer. If I went to a ping pong match in China, I would expect to hear someone pray to Buddha ... and I wouldn't be offended. It wouldn't bother me one bit. When in Rome .....

But what about the atheists? This is another argument. What about them? Nobody is asking them to be baptized. We're not going to pass the collection plate. Just humor us for 30 seconds. If that's asking too much, bring a Walkman or a pair of ear plugs. Go to the bathroom. Visit the concession stand. Call your lawyer! Unfortunately, one or two will make that call. One or two will tell thousands what they can and cannot do. I don't think a short prayer at a football game is going to shake the world's foundations. Christians are just sick and tired of turning the other cheek while our courts strip us of all our rights. Our parents and grandparents taught us to pray before eating and to pray before we go to sleep. Our Bible tells us to pray without ceasing. Now a handful of people and their lawyers are telling us to cease praying. God, help us. And if that last sentence offends you, well, just sue me ...

The silent majority has been silent too long. It's time we tell that one or two who scream loud enough to be heard that the vast majority doesn't care what they want. It is time that the majority rules! It's time we tell them, "You don't have to pray; you don't have to say the Pledge of Allegiance; you don't have to believe in God or attend services that honor Him. That is your right, and we will honor your right; but by golly, you are no longer going to take our rights away. We are fighting back, and we WILL WIN!"

God bless us one and all ... especially those who denounce Him. God bless America and Canada, despite all our faults, we are still the greatest nations of all. God bless our service men who are fighting to protect our right to pray and worship God.

Let's make this next year the year the silent majority is heard and we put God back as the foundation of our families and institutions ... and the year our military forces come home from all the wars.

Keep looking up ...

“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale

Larry Says ...

Hello everyone, it's good to be back from my week away babysitting.  Since I mostly share your thoughts to post here, I had to come up with something myself for today. Okay by me.  Someone sent me this thing from Larry The Cableman in an email and, as Larry would say, "I don't care who ya' are, this here's funny ..."  Enjoy!  ~CJ

"Everyone concentrates on the problems we're having in Our Country lately: Illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, alligators attacking people in Florida . . . Not me -- I concentrate on solutions for the problems -- see, it's a win-win situation.

* Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border.
* Send the dirt to New Orleans to raise the level of the levees.
* Put the Florida alligators in the moat along the Mexican border.

Any other problems you would like for me to solve today?

Okay, now think about this:

1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments
  


COWS

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.  

THE CONSTITUTION

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for   Iraq ...why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore. 

THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this -- you cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians, it creates a hostile work environment.

Also, think about this ... if you don't want to share this for fear of offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM!"

“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale

Hugs & Toddlers

Remember what it was like to be a child? It was something very different from who we are today. It was to believe in love and magic, to believe in fairies, to believe in belief, to be so little that the elves could reach to whisper in our ear; it was about turning pumpkins into coaches, and mice to horses, and nothing into everything, because every child has a fairy godmother in its soul ... and a grandmother for a best friend. ~CJ

Hello Everyone,

Just to give you a little heads up ... I'm going to be out of town for the next week, leaving today. I'll be in Connecticut babysitting two of my grandsons, both preschoolers, while a daughter and her husband go away for a much-needed R&R to rediscover that they are more than a mommy and daddy.

I'll be in Grammy Heaven; however, being a little out of practice with busy toddlers, I'm relatively sure any down time I have while they're napping will be spent doing laundry, cooking, picking up toys, or (I had to admit it), taking a power nap of my own to recoup. There probably won't be much time for the internet and its writing pleasures, including posting here.

Stay with me.  I promise I'll be back online when I return on the 23rd. In the meantime, please think of me knee-deep in much-missed grammy hugs, bedtime stories, night-night kisses, and playing cars and Legos on the floor with two little boys that I love so dearly.

Thanks!
CJ

P.S. I would LOVE to see my email box overflowing with your thoughts and stories when I get home ...


“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale