A Different War, A Changed World: by James Hathorn

PTSD and War

[This post was left as a comment on The Last Road, a Vietnam Vet's Perspective, written by Vietnam veteran, Michael Lansford, on July 9, 2014. 

I felt this was a significant article, one that should be its own post, because James speaks for all Vietnam veterans here. --CJ]

In reading Michael Lansford's writings, I find them to be powerful in their reach into our minds and souls, as best as words are able.

Often, I think about not only what Vietnam was like for me, but what other wars must have been like for other American soldiers. Then I wonder whether I am being arrogant, to think that our war was different from any other war. To me, the most obvious difference was not about how we went off to war, but how it was for us when we came back home. 

In no other war that I know of throughout history did the people who stayed home resent those who went to fight. The reason for the war is not important, in terms of the effect on the soldiers. All wars have horrors, casualties, and death. We all had them and it lived inside us then, lives in us now, and it will be there forever.

One twenty-three hour ride on a TWA jet airliner and our world was changed forever. The time there was a blink of an eye. The time since then has been an eternity.

I am a disabled veteran. I did not even apply for benefits until forty some years after returning from Vietnam. My injuries were numerous, both physical and mental. The mental one has been the most insufferable. I did not believe in post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and I did not apply for that disability. My VSO (Veteran's Service Officer) suggested that I apply for PTSD. The VA scheduled me for a psych eval.

At the interview, I was asked a lot of questions, some related to Vietnam and my injuries, and some related to civilian life, before and after. The one question the psychiatrist asked that hit me hardest was, "What event do you feel contributed most to your anxiety over your time in the war?" 

I had to think for a minute. Then it suddenly dawned on me that the trouble I have had for years in interpersonal relationships, social interaction, sleeplessness, etc., were not due to my two tours in country, but the stark and explosive consciousness at the Sea Tac airport, when I came home and the months that followed.

Anti-war Protesters

In Vietnam, I was with real brothers.

As I stepped into the entrance area of the airport, it was like a different country from the one I left almost two years earlier. There were dirty people in robes carrying signs telling us we were killers and war mongering trash.

That complete culture shock was what caused me the most pain since the war. That pain is still with me, but I don't think it is just with me, but in America as well.

Those war protesters and draft dodgers are now a majority and they are running the country. They have changed America from the home we fought for into the ideology we fought against.

To get to my point, I was at 100% disability before being diagnosed with PTSD, but once I was diagnosed with it, I wanted to know what the psychological evaluation actually said. I filed a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) for a release of the information.

The report did not state specifically why I was diagnosed, but I think the sum of all things up to, and including, my return to the "World" are what caused our war to be different from those wars, before and since.

The mental pain of rejection for doing the right thing and being denigrated for it has changed us Vietnam vets in a way the rest of our country cannot ever understand. We struggle to try to explain it in words; however, the only thing that results is that people hear what we say, but they cannot feel what we say. It is important that our people understand, so it does not happen again.

I think I know what Michael feels and what it is that drives him to write. He has a talent for getting as close as anyone can to putting that whole time and place into words ... 

James Hathorn

James Hathorn
Sgt. U.S. Air Force
November 1966 – July 1968
Cam Ranh Bay, South Vietnam

Armament & Electronics,
Weapons Control Systems
F4C-F4E Phantom fighter bomber




E-mail James

Also by James Hathorn:

Homeland Militia Survey



“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do, and by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale


Add your opinion, thought, or comment, about this post. You are also invited to write about anything you want to share. Send it to me in an e-mail and I will be proud to post it for you.

Memoirs From Nam is YOUR blog.

Homeland Militia Survey: by James Hathorn

James Hathorn

This veteran saw Vietnam some 48 years ago as a weapon control systems mechanic at Cam Ranh Bay, RVN primarily working on F4C-E fighter-bomber aircraft.

In addition to fixing jet radar systems, I saw combat first-hand through travel in country, which involved collecting parts for planes and augmentee duty in support of the Air Police around the perimeter of the base. 

Two tours gave me many opportunities to see and, to a lesser extent, be involved in actual combat situations. 

Counter insurgency operations found me dodging incoming mortar fire, sniper fire, sabotage operations and generally messy war time stuff that civilians cannot imagine. 

When fresh food was available, it was hard to enjoy due to the potential for contaminated fare (i.e. ground glass in sliced tomatoes, etc). But, it was not all fighting all the time. In fact, much of the time was spent waiting for something to happen, while making sure our pilots had worthy aircraft to take it to the enemy.

That is one’s typical experience of the war itself. In addition to the time in a war zone, there was significant training to prepare us for being in it. 

Boot camp consisted of physical training, firearms training, training for capture situations, hand to hand combat training and most of all, self-discipline that would last a lifetime. 

Vietnam veterans are generally in their 60’s now, but the war experience is still fresh for most of us.

This has all been the background for something I am going to suggest:

In the world today, we are faced with a war that is unlike any of the previous wars. This war is asymmetrical, in that it is not state-sponsored, and the enemy is as anxious to die, as we are to live. 

They want a caliphate (Caliphate: a millennium-old dream of a single empire to unite all the Sunni Muslims of the world) that will literally take over the world. 

They indoctrinate their children in this deadly ideology. They abuse their women by cutting off sexual organs, and kill them for indiscretions. They kill homosexuals for being gay. They are taxed until they have no resources left, then they are killed. 

If they convert an individual from faith other than Muslim, they call them apostates (Apostate: a person who renounces a religious or political belief, or principle). The apostate is treated as less than a true believer. 

Our government announced the war is over. The President has withdrawn and critically downsized our Armed Forces. But the war is not over for the jihadists. Their jihad is against all but Islamists and they are all to be killed. 

The jihad is everywhere. The war will not be over for them, until their caliphate is complete. The world will be populated with Islamists and their apostates, if left to their ideology. All other religions and non-religionists will be exterminated -- if America does not act.

That may sound absurd, but it most assuredly is not. Evidence is everywhere. In France, the Parliament is infiltrated with Islamists. In Germany, there are communities where the Islamists do not assimilate into the German culture. Norway, Sweden, Scandinavia are all the same. 

In all of Europe, the Islamists have jihadist training camps and enclaves. The people of the European countries are intimidated and afraid to go into the Islamist neighborhoods. 

Israel is surrounded by Hamas and the Middle East is being consumed by killers. The radical Islamist objective is to make a caliphate of the entire world.

In America, we have seen terrorist training camps.  There are enclaves of Islamists in Michigan, New York, and many other places, that will not assimilate into the surrounding cultures. We have an extreme leftist Muslim in the House of Representatives. 

Our borders are wide open and the OTM (other than Mexicans), (we don’t know who they are), can come in at will, especially through the southern border, where the government will not act.

The radicals are not to be dismissed as an inconvenience for the rest of the world, or the “JV Team”. They can and will be coming here -- they are already here. To eradicate us is their goal.

This message is to stress the urgency of the situation and what we, as veterans and older Americans, have the opportunity and responsibility to do to protect our homeland.

The Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution is second to the First, The Freedom of Speech and Religion of all Americans, and purposely so. 

The Second Amendment is to ensure that the people have the granted authority and duty to protect not only the First Amendment, but to empower individual citizens to protect their Homeland:

“A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed upon.”

We, as individuals, who are of good standing as citizens of the United States of America, are the designated "Militia" referred to in the Second Amendment (see above).

In the present time, there is a greater enemy than any we have ever faced. It is time for a Homeland Militia to step up and be prepared for what is surely to come. Our way of life is threatened around the world. For the first time, our liberty is threatened more than ever before, and from within our own borders.

In order to keep and protect the freedom and respect we treasure as Americans and expect with, or without, our leadership, it is time to consider how we can do just that.

There are veterans of all wars with the values and skills that can be tapped to make a difference when our communities are actually under siege. There are many of us from the Vietnam era with the values and expertise to contribute once again to our country. It is time to put our affairs in order.

This preamble leads up to a very important subject that could change the balance of the argument over the Second Amendment, gun control, and power of the American people.

Until recently, Americans have been complacent. The vast majority of the population wants to know, “What can we do?”

The time has come for action. We need to come together to protect our families, our homes, and our neighbors. In order to come together, we need to communicate and communication requires structure.

We have to form an organized Homeland Militia that consists of every able-bodied individual. The exception might have to be active and reserve military and Federal law enforcement. 

We have to organize everyone into a national, standby, paramilitary entity with structure and leadership. This entity should be, under ideal circumstances, a functional extension of the existing U.S. Armed Forces. 

The members would be assigned rank, based on ability, skill, and resources (personal time and availability). There has to be a leadership structure with a commander at the top, regional leaders and local leaders, etc. 

Coordination and communication are essential, so the Homeland Militia will know what to do in any situation, where mobilization would be required. 

Those situations would be times when our homeland is threatened by invasion, as could happen with the expansion of the Islamic caliphate, internal disturbances such as what occurred recently with the Treyvon Martin and Michael Brown shootings, and also in natural disasters.

All members would have a verifiable ID -- ID cards should be issued.  In order to be a member, background checks and clearances would be imperative and required, to ensure that the Homeland Militia is not populated with undesirable and/or criminal types that would subvert the organization. 

A lot of the necessary identification is already available for many people. We have retired police, military, and private law enforcement who already have the necessary documentation, i.e. DD-214, security clearance, background checks, etc. 

Applications for the Homeland Militia ID will need to be designed and made available to all potential members. 

All Americans are eligible, per the Constitutional Amendments; however, in order to effectively communicate, we have to know who the members are. A roster for assignments necessarily would have to be created and maintained.

Leadership would be chosen by methods to be determined, but would necessarily have to be selected through the democratic process. 

The Homeland Militia leaders would have strong coordination with the U.S. military leadership. Caution in that regard would dictate that the Homeland Militia have autonomy, due to the nature of the current administration. 

The Homeland Militia necessarily cannot be controlled by the U.S. military, or government. The whole purpose granted to citizens by the Second Amendment is to protect the people from the government. 

In these times, the government is adverse to the military and even more adverse to the people being organized, armed, and informed. The Second Amendment is slowly being diminished by the government.

Lastly, I believe the majority of the leaders and ranking members of the Homeland Militia should come from our U.S. military veterans, who have experience, but are not part of the present military. 

There are thousands of older veterans who are able and could serve again and they should be given that opportunity. They are a valuable resource that cannot be overlooked, nor under-utilized.

There are many parts and pieces that will need to be developed for this association to happen.  No one person can do this in a vacuum.  It will take the input and ideas from every one of you who reads this.

At this point in time, this is only a survey.  I do not claim to have the solution. We need all of us to participate. 

Please send your comments and suggestions. All ideas will be coordinated into a plan to be published for further refinement. Please also inform family, friends, and associates you know, anyone you feel would have the character and values to be a part of this Homeland Militia Project.

James Hathorn
Sgt. U.S. Air Force
November 1966 – July 1968

Cam Ranh Bay, South Vietnam

Armament & Electronics, 

Weapons Control Systems 

F4C-F4E Phantom fighter bomber 

E-mail James


See Also: 
Live Free Or Die: by Roger A. Sanchez - August 29, 2014


“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do, and by the grace of God, I will.” ~Everett Hale


If you are a Vietnam veteran, you are invited to write about anything you would like to share. Send it to me in an e-mail and I will be proud to post it for you.

Memoirs From Nam is YOUR blog.